Providing corrective feedback poses many challenges for leaders. When discussing this topic with managers, one might conclude that they much prefer to offer praise rather than point out shortcomings or mistakes. This is understandable, as we naturally don’t want our words to put anyone in an unpleasant emotional state. A good manager, however, does not shy away from responding when the situation calls for it—they provide feedback as soon as possible, ideally while the employee can still correct their mistake or immediately after the situation occurred. This ensures that the context of the feedback is not an abstraction detached from the specific event, but an integral part of what happened (the mistake and the feedback immediately following it).
- We provide corrective feedback as soon as possible after an employee’s mistake is discovered.
On the other hand, however, it is important to mention a very significant factor that influences both the giving and receiving of feedback: emotions. After all, the goal is to motivate the employee, not to offend them or leave them feeling incompetent for the rest of the day. That is why we ALWAYS provide feedback with a cool head—not in the heat of the moment—because emotions such as anger or rage completely shut down the neocortex—the centers of clear and logical thinking. We then revert to our most primal instincts—fight, freeze, or flight—and there is no room for a constructive conversation.
- We always provide corrective feedback with a cool head.
So how can we reconcile these two principles? Remember that feedback must be given as soon as possible after an error is discovered, but not in the heat of the moment. It doesn’t have to be given the very instant we notice a shortcoming in an employee’s work or inappropriate behavior. It’s okay to step away for a moment, take a breath, relax a bit, let the emotions subside, and only then, once we’ve calmed down and have a “clear head,” approach the employee.
The following can help us cope with sudden emotional changes:
- Music (e.g., relaxing music)
- Deep breaths
- Adopt a relaxed posture—loosen your muscles.
Finally , it’s always worth mentioning that we have a high opinion of the employee and the quality of their work, and that we view this particular situation as an exception that nevertheless warrants attention.
